is the matter with me have I no self control? A birthday, a incredibly rare night out and insatiable pre-time of the month cravings and I gain 3.25 lbs. Still I start the gym for real tomorrow and am looking forward to putting some effort in.
I lay in bed the other night and realised I slept with my arms folded and wondered if it was significant. I think I need a teddy to cuddle..........
in years the inside of a gym today and it wasn't as bad as I thought. There again it was only myself and the physio so there was no one to feel self conscious in front of. I also found out someone at work runs an exercise class there on a Tuesday evening so I may pluck up the courage to go there too. I totally forgot to weigh myself (freudian slip?) so watch this space tomorrow. TODAY feel positive and for once I'd like it to last longer than a day.
detox! Stayed at my parents for several days and it's impossible to eat normally! All the wrong things in +++ quantities and I'm relieved to be back to normality. Wonder what the scales will say in the morning?
Well Wednesday I go to a gym for the first time in years but thankfully no one will be there to see me make a fool of myself because it's a gym at work that patients use post breast surgery. And if I get used to it I may feel less self conscious about joining a gym at the local sports centre.
13 st 6.5 and feel fine, and very grateful to feel so. Days of torment over self image and body image are incredibly draining and wasteful. But when you're in the midst of torment you feel powerless to do anything about it. Still I'm looking forward to some changes and hopefully I can be comfortable in my own skin for the first time in my life.
p.s. where is my mr.right though? I know already - he doesn't exist.
what I weigh today but I feel fine so we'll see what the scales say a.m. Last week I had to go to my GP for an injection into my shoulder prior to physio and despite the fact she hit the bone (ouch!) I'm so glad I went. I used to work for her and I told her how I felt that I never go out apart from going to work and only when I absolutely, absolutely have to; part of this I told her was due to my weight issues and she has kindly agreed to weigh me once a month in confidence. This is to get me out of the house and help me be more motivated.
Another good thing that happened was that when I went to physio, the therapist kindly offered to go to the gym with me that is available to patients where I work - in the hope this will give me the confidence to go the public gym, that I have avoided for so long through fear of embarrassment. So things feels quite positive at the moment............hopefully it will last and I can stop torturing myself all the time.
