Description : Let me re-say something about myself, I make this blog just to remember myself of the feeling I have on one boy, there is no binding, not due when it is gonna end, but i would keep writing here about how and how much I feel for him....
I am the first child of the family, big girl with intention to make good and do good for my family.
I love to write as it make me feel better after I could releasing what is inside my brain and my thought and my heart...
Listen to this song, I miss you, P. Not all the lyric means, but you know what I am talking about here.
*********** First of all I wanna tell you that all I do is have love for you (Love for you) No matter we go our seperate ways I still ride for you (ride for you)
Cause youre the truth (cause youre the truth) Can't be replaced (can't be replaced) You?re the type of girl to make a nigga go out and get the ring. But the problem is, I'm not positive that I can give the commitment that you're asking for.
Cause right now I'm young and though you're the one. I can't guarantee that I can be the one you want. You want someone who is faithful. I'm not admitting I can't do it; just don't wanna put you through it.
If I may happen to see one, She may holler I may holler, but I wouldn't wanna do that to you.
Girl I feel that I'll be cheatin' you If I continue to see you Cause you're ready to get serious, I'm not cause I'm still curious
I'd rather keep it real, than tell you how I feel. Cause I think you're beautiful, and I don't want to hurt ya, no.
See over and over again I keep on sayin? to myself I must be goin' out my mind to not wanna spend all my time with her. Cause I love ya more than to game your heart.
Cause I know that I'm not ready, To lock it down full time, Settle down with one dime, spend the rest of my life with you.
It's better to cry now then to hate me later Trust me, I've had a broken heart before. And I know just how it feels, And know in time it will... In time it will reveal, if our love is real.
Girl I feel that I'll be cheatin' you If I continue to see you Cause you're ready to get serious, I'm not cause I'm still curious
I'd rather keep it real, And tell you how I feel. Cause I think you're beautiful, and I don't want to hurt ya, no.
Trust me girl, I never wanted to, I never wanted to hurt you.
Trust me girl, I never wanted to, I never wanted to hurt you.
I called this morning, but nobody picked up the line. Called again and waited till the line was transferred to voice mail. Are you OK, P? Just want to talk to you & want to know if you are feeling good.
Back to me when you are ready, OK? :
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"it is like you fall down from the s ky!" "I boarded the plane!"
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"Hatsciiii.... arh.. somebody is missing me!" "Im here!"
My favor hair salon closed last night, so I tried other shop! Totally know it was not good idea, but I didn't want to pay much for it too, so.........Arhhhhhhhhhhh !!! my Thai maybe not proper and the result is pretty.... weird (for sure different from what I told him !)
I have hair cut, I have a short hair , I LOOK LIKE A TOMBOY!!!! :(
Well, ... to have a short hair is better than having straws all over my head, not long its gonna be fine and I would be ... cute AGAIN ! :)
I remember when I read blog of "lalola77" when she did the article 100, she was so happy. And today I did it too. Cheerss !!!
I was scare sometimes that I might stop this blog before it reaches the 100. Who knows?? I don't know how long I could have this feeling on P, how long I could talk to myself and keep smiling to myself, or when he will tell me that he might be not feel comfortable with this relationship anymore, ... or whatever season!! Anyway, I have made here till today 100 articles!! And my feeling has never changed!
This is life, like weather; sunny day & rainy day, like ocean; big waves & slient surface, like chocolate; bitter & sweet, ... Everybody needs the best for himself, but if we don't forget that the best & one happiness is to accept life as hard & as sweet as it is. --> "as good as it gets"...I have chosen to trust P from knowing him 5 months, and spending time with him.. perhaps 2 months !! We might share some interests, but there are still some we have to learn, well, let's say I should learn about him. As I say all the time "to know is one thing, and to accept is something else. However, once you know and you understand, you could prepare to handle". P wants to/ try to make perfect, I want to make thing perfert too. But when we intend and dedicate and that thing still miss the perfect, we feel small. I feel it sometimes and could understand if P has his bad day and feeling blue. However, there are sometimes while I see him trying to make perfect (as much as he can) it makes me smile and appreciate his intention. Many times of sadness & crying alone with this relationship, but there are many times as well that I have never believed that I can feel this much happy!!
Time flies and heals as it is ... I wish I could reach the article 200 and I wish P is still my good boy, this is want I want, not much, right?? :)
"Poohbear is with you & panda (koala) is still with me".. miss you P!